Let’s Talk – How to Have Better Conversations (Nihal Arthanayake)

 ISBN: 978-1-298-7022-6

Verdict: 👍👍 

The title is slightly misleading, as it’s not so much ‘let’s talk’ but more let’s get other people’s experiences, views, and reflections then share with the audience - which worked for me , as the author introduces some interesting individuals.

The book is a nice read once you get past page 31. Then on page 33 the author Introduces us to Johann Hari’s book Stolen Focus (which I subsequently bought) and then we had ‘lift off.’ And the book became an enjoyable read.

The book is not a self-improvement type book i.e., presenting frameworks or rules but presents  a set of lessons and experiences which were shared by third parties, and I did find myself highlighting some interesting quotes and conversational strategies. Below I list some of the bits I highlighted and who the quotes can be attributed to;

P34 [ Johann Hari] - ‘ If you’re interrupted , it takes you on average twenty-three minutes to get back to the same level of focus that you had before you were interrupted .’

P66[ Elizabeth Stokoe ]- ‘an effective conversation is one that generates the least misunderstanding, the least friction , the least need to do the thing again, And the least tension and friction and misunderstanding as you make progress together across the arc of interaction.’

P97 [Mary McAllese] – ‘the impetus should be to listen more than talk.’

P133 [John Sutherland] – ‘ Active Listening – ‘Its not just about passively not speaking , its actively listening , not just to what you’re saying but how you’re saying it’.

P172 [Rick Haythornthwaite]- ‘ you owe it to people to be responsible for the words that come out of your mouth’

P233  [Tanya Byron] -  Sometimes you must ask really difficult, sometime quite outrageous questions in order to understand the parameters of an issue.’

The book is an enjoyable read and if you're handed a copy its worth reading.